Earthworm Zim Chp. 11, part 1

The sun shone as the Tallest, Twilight, Spike, and Apple Bloom trailed through Ponyville, calm and content to start a new day.
Apple Bloom stood close by Purple as she smiled admiringly up at him. Purple caught her gaze and shared her smile before he looked up and spotted Twilight's other friends at a nearby restaurant.

"Hello, Tallest!" Pinkie Pie giggled, a mouthful of eggs and pancakes. "Boy, isn't a great day to have breakfast?" She rambled. "Of, course I'll eat breakfast any day, any time, anywhere! Eggs isn't just a morning meal, you know, because-"

"And how'd you guys sleep?" Rainbow Dash cut in.

"It was great, thank you," Red smiled.

"And, of course..." Rainbow Dash gazed down at Apple Bloom. She was surprised to see the filly actually smile up at Purple.

"Don't worry," Apple Bloom beamed. "The Tallest are great. And I love them." She moved closer and nuzzled herself against Purple.

Purple smiled warmly, before smiling at the other ponies to prove her point.

"Aw, isn't that just wonderful?" Pinkie Pie cooed. She turned to Twilight. "Hey, Twilight, I saw you running through the rain last night. What happened?"

"Milo had a sugar-low going on or something," Twilight sighed. "But he's fine now."

"I bet..." Rainbow Dash chuckled.

"You know what I just realized," Pinkie Pie said, "everyone in Ponyville has met the Tallest...but what about Princess Celestia?"

"Princess Celestia?" Red repeated.

"Oh, she's ruler of Equestria, my Tallest," Twilight explained. "She and her sister Luna."

"Man, they would love to see you!" Rainbow Dash said. "Considering you guys are like royal or whatever."

"Forgive me, the princesses can be very busy at most times," Twilight told Red.

"Oh, it's okay," Red chuckled. "Take all the time you need. We won't be leaving anytime soon."

"Really?" Apple Bloom's eyes brightened as she continued gazing at Purple.

"Any chance we can have some cupcakes for breakfast?" Purple asked.
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Yo and Lupe looked up from their lemonade stand as the Tallest, accompanied by and Fanboy and Chum Chum, came strolling over, enjoying the surroundings of their town.

Yo placed on her cutest smile as they approached their stand. "Greetings, my Tallest!" She giggled.

"Uh, do we bow or something?" Lupe asked.

Red sighed. "Honestly, save the bows. For once Purple and I just want to be treated like everyone else."

"Because we're family!" Fanboy exclaimed happily, placing a hand on each Tallest. Twilight explained to Rocky, whom mentioned to Fanboy, and it was pretty obvious to everyone now.

"Care for some lemonade?" Yo asked sweetly.

"What's lemonade?" Purple asked, gazing at the pitcher of yellow liquid.

"Only the most delicious, nutritious, and ever so wonderful drink on our planet!" Yo said before pouring into two cups. She smiled sweetly at them before offering them their drinks. "It's in the house, sirs." Though she was a little disappointed she wouldn't get a sale from the two tall aliens, whose money was nothing like humans'...

"Delicious," Purple said as he took a sip. "Lots of sugar..."

"Irk would love this," Red chuckled before taking another sip.

Red turned just in time to see the doors of the Frosty Mart open and out came Lenny with his arm around Lunessa.

"But I don't know how to use a register!" Shouted Boog's voice from within the store.

"Not my problem!" Lenny spat as the doors closed. He smiled back at Lunessa. "You really need to get going now?"

Lunessa smiled sweetly. "The fairies need me for this very important meeting." She placed a hand on his cheek. "I'll miss you."

Lenny chuckled as he gently grasped her hand. "Miss you even more, sweetheart."

Red watched as they exchanged a kiss before parting ways. Lenny walked over to the lemonade stand before Lunessa flew off, obviously heading toward her home known as Pixie Hollow. He continued watching Lenny as the young teen bought himself a cup of lemonade before nodding in greeting to the Tallest.

Finally, Red cleared his throat. "I couldn't help but notice how incredibly...infatuated you and Lunessa are."

Lenny raised an eyebrow at him. "Yeah?"

"Well..." Red played with his cup nervously. "What's that like?"

"You mean love?" The teen asked, gazing at him with surprise. "You mean you and Purple...?" He looked over to Purple, who was drinking more lemonade.

Red bit his lip. "Honestly, though we are the Tallest...girls have never really crossed our minds more than snacks do..."

Lenny nearly snorted. "You're almost like Boog."

Red looked at him again. "So what's it like?" He asked eagerly.

"Well..." Lenny began. "It's a walking-on-air feeling...you feel really happy...you tolerate more with your life, I'm sure you can see what that's like..." He gazed over to Fanboy and Chum Chum, who were busy doing a finger trick.

"But isn't Lunessa...?" Red began quietly.

Lenny smiled. "Lunessa's a fairy...so love really is magic."

"I thought friendship was magic," Purple cut in, just hearing their conversation.

"Magic is many things, my friend," Lenny said wisely. He smiled at Red. "I'm sure you guys will find some magic in your life." And he winked at them.

"Well, true, Twilight is quite the breathing air of unbelievability," Red pondered.

Lenny tried not to laugh at his oblivion. "I meant love, man."

"Love?" Purple said in confusion. "What's that got to do with Twilight?"
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"Thank you again for coming over, Ms. Lemur," Oscar said politely before leading a tall, female lemur into his and Milo's home.

"Hi, Ms. Lemur!" Keef greeted as he sat on the couch with Bea and Milo.

Vanessa Lemur smiled, thankful to see her fish friends once again. Being a teacher at Charles Darwin Middle School was stressful, especially with dealing with Principal Pixiefrog, Jake Spidermonkey, or both. She ran a hand through her black bangs before smiling at the group before her, grateful to spend some time with them.

And Keef. He was such a darling, and Vanessa was happy that he wanted to spend time with everyone, especially with Bea, Oscar, and Milo.

Milo smiled at her as he laid on the couch, a bag of chips in his hands. He had to admire Ms. Lemur: strong, independent, and quite lovely, especially with her violet eyes.

But her violet eyes could never compare to the gorgeous ones of Twilight Sparkle.

Thinking of Twilight nearly ached Milo's heart as he quickly dug into his chips as Vanessa sat down between him and Keef.

"Uh, Keef?" Vanessa began. "How are you breathing underwater?" She regarded the human child closely.

"Frink gave me a breathing mint," he replied happily. He took out a bag full of candy pieces. "I'm the test subject."

"And you obliged?" She asked skeptically.

"Well, sure, Frink may be kind of cooky, but he would never fail us!" He beamed. "I mean, look what he had done for Zim, Skoodge, and the Tallest!"

"Yeah..." Oscar said as he smirked at Milo. "I bet Twilight Sparkle is showering Tallest Red with steaks and drinking barbecue sauce."

"You shut yo mouth!" Milo exclaimed, feeling his heart race with fear.

Vanessa swished her tail out and wrapped it around Oscar's mouth, tightening the grip as she casted him a warning glance. She was well aware of Milo's "secret" crush on Twilight Sparkle, and she was ever supportive of it. A veteran in such arts, she could only hope Milo wouldn't end up in terribly heartbreak. Twilight was another matter. She had observed the ever intelligent pony...always in her studies, taking serious action in everything, acting like the boss...Vanessa wondered if Twilight ever studied in the terms of love.

And when the Tallest arrived...Vanessa immediately realized that Twilight didn't need an exact definition to describe her senses regarding Tallest Red...

"Thank you, Ms. Lemur..." Milo sighed before laying back against the couch.

"Well, you got to admit..." Bea said. "I mean, Red seems-"

Vanessa shot her hand out and placed a hand over the fish's lips. The human lemur barred her teeth, narrowing her eyes at her. Yes, Vanessa had to admit, Red was quite an attractive being for an alien...but she really wished Bea and Oscar didn't have to keep reminding Milo of it...and how much it involved Twilight.  

Keef scratched his head in confusion as he watched both his friends' mouths seal up by Vanessa.

"Uh, can we play Uno now?" He asked before taking out his deck of cards. "You guys remember how Zim still has a hard time with this game."

"Oh, I'm sure his Earth parents will help him out," Vanessa chuckled. "That or Rocky..." She tried to stifle her giggle.Ah, young love..., She thought with a smile.

"Hey, that reminds me..." Milo began. "You guys remember Brian's deranged family? Whom, as well as all of Quahog, doesn't remember Meg anymore?"

Bea snorted. "Don't remind us of that terrible place, Milo."

"Bea is right," Vanessa said. "Yeah, I bet as soon as Peter sees Zim...the jokes won't cease." She cringed at the thought of all the fart jokes that were going to be pulled on poor Zim.

"Hey, didn't you go shopping there once?" Oscar asked. "You were trying to look for a plug-in bra-"

"Yes," she cut in sharply. "And while doing so, I bumped into Peter...actually, it wasn't his face I bumped into if you know what I mean..." She cringed once again.

"What's Brian's family like, Ms. Lemur?" Keef asked curiously.

The female lemur looked down at him and sighed. "I'll tell you one thing about them, Keef..." She said. "If you ever look up an article for world's biggest douche, you might find the name: Peter Griffin."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Red played with his fingers nervously as he watched Frink and Keswick set up some equipment in Rarity's boutique.

"And why are we doing this again?" Red asked before he and Purple exchanged a nervous glance.

"Because many humans are going to wonder why the b-b-both of you have a 'skin condition' like Zim," Keswick explained.

Twilight and her friends, along with Brian, Rita, Zim, Dib, Frida, Rocky, and Gir stood around the shop, anticipating for the action to occur.

"You're not going to tickle them again, are you?" Dib asked, casting a nervous glance at the Tallest.

"We fixed it, young man," Frink assured him. "We've come to realize that the tickling really isn't that funny anymore."

"It nearly killed us," Purple stated.

"And I assure you there won't be any near-d-d-death experiences of any kind," Keswick said before he checked his clipboard. "Now while we set these up, I believe Ms. Rarity will be working as your personal normality clothes stylist."

"Please," Rarity said gracefully as she stood between the Tallest. "Just call me a fashionista." She gazed at the Tallest from head to toe. "Oh, the fashion of your planet is wonderful...but it must change."

"What?" Red cried. "We can't change! These are our leader's attire."

"Oh, but you simply must," Rarity insisted. "It shouldn't be shameful to dress in new things."

"Yeah, when was the last time you tried anything different?" Brian asked.

"Honestly, you guys could go for some decent human clothes," Dib said. "Considering..."

"You guys are wearing dresses fit for a wedding," Frida said simply.

"These are not dresses!" Red shouted angrily.

"Look, just bare with this," Rocky pleaded. "I mean, do you really want Quahog to look at the way you are?"

"What exactly is Quahog like, again?" Purple asked, turning to Brian and Rita.

"A mistake made by God..." Brian muttered.

"Ah, here we go!" Rarity beamed before pulling out a cart full of new clothes she designed.

Red gazed at them with doubt. Twilight noticed his reluctance and gave his hand an assuring nuzzle with her forehead.

"Please try, my Tallest," she pleaded softly. She gave Red a sincere smile. "To be honest, I can assure you that you would look good in anything." She tried not to show her blush.

"Twilight's never wrong with these kind of things," Rocky added supportingly.

Red gave her a nervous smile before regarding the clothes Rarity had. "I'll take your word for it, Ms. Sparkle. As well as you, Rochelle..." He gulped before gazing at Rarity. "Alright, pony...hit me!"
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
One hour later...

"Are they ready yet?" Apple Bloom asked impatiently as she and the others waited outside the boutique.

"Hustle down, Apple Bloom," Applejack chuckled. "You know how Rarity is about fashion, especially for some folks like the Tallest."

Rocky looked up from the book she and Twilight were reading and noticed Zim narrowing his eyes at the boutique with such impatience.

"Rarity won't take forever, Zim," she said.

"Yeah, yeah," Zim muttered. Finally, he looked at her. "Since when has everyone began paying attention to the Tallest more than me? I mean, Zim came to Earth first!"

Frida smirked, overhearing their conversation. "Don't be so jealous, Zim..."

"Jealous?" Zim exclaimed. "Zim? Never!"

"And here they are!" Rita exclaimed happily as the doors of the boutique opened.

"It is with great pleasure..." Rarity said proudly as she stood in front of the doorway. "To introduce the most dashing, most glamorous, most incredibly tallest...Red and Purple!"

And she stood out of the way...

....Twilight and Rocky moved in front to get the better view...

...out came the Tallest.

Red stood in a slightly dark red shirt and black jeans with red and black sneakers...Purple wore a light purple long-sleeve shirt with darker purple jeans with white sneakers...

Everyone could recognize them as the Tallest...but their Irken eyes were hidden well behind human eyelids like Zim's...and both were wearing dark-haired wigs...and their skin...though the green was still visible, it was faded and an almost human skin complexion emerged within the alien skin.

Twilight and Rocky's jaws dropped at the sight of the Tallest in their disguises. Apple Bloom tried not to faint at the sight of Purple.

"M-my Tallest..." Twilight stuttered, unable to blink, her eyes completely focused on Red. "You two look so...look so..."

"You guys look alright," Spike cut in, trying to sound nonchalant before casting Twilight a glance.

"More than alright," Rocky muttered. She never took her eyes off the Tallest as she nudged Zim. "Zim...did I ever tell you I think your leaders are cute?"

Zim blinked before he pretended to gag. Frida smirked at his reaction.

"Why are you still a little green?" Pinkie Pie asked.

"Unfortunately, the machine couldn't boost that high," Frink explained before smiling at both Tallest. "But their skin does look nearly human that no one can tell of any exterior flaw."

"These pants feel pretty good," Purple said, tugging at the top of his jeans.

"Well, I think you two look very handsome," Rita smiled before patting each on the back.

"Oh, yeah..." Twilight nodded, her violet eyes sparkling at the sight of Red. "Very...very...handsome..."

Red met her gaze, a grateful smile on his lips. "Thanks, Sparkle."

"Wow, Purple!" Apple Bloom exclaimed before she raced over and circled around him. "Your feet are actually touching ground!"

"Yet I'm still tall!" Purple said proudly.

"Man, he is just so cute..." Rocky muttered, gazing at Purple.

Frida tried not to giggle when she noticed Zim pouting behind Rocky's back.

"So..." Brian began as he looked at his watch. He sighed with dread. "Let's go to he-I mean Quahog."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"Really?" Bea said over the phone. "The science guys really did that? Wow, Twilight..."

Milo raised his head from their game of Uno and glanced at Bea, having heard Twilight's name.

"Red does look good?" Bea asked. "You sure you haven't thought he looked good before?"

"Oh, fish cakes..." Milo muttered under his breath, dropping his head against his cards.

"I win!" Keef exclaimed.

"I'm not surprised," Oscar chuckled as he and Vanessa looked at Milo with his head down. "Even before we played Uno, Milo's been losing."

"Hush yo mouth!" Vanessa said sassily. "Can't you see he's upset?" She regarded Milo worriedly. She could understand what he was going through. She had been there in her younger years...

"What is Milo so upset about?" Keef asked in confusion.

"Okay, bye, Twilight," Bea said before hanging up and swimming back to their game. "Twilight said the Tallest are in disguise."

"Like Zim?" Vanessa asked, shuffling the cards.

"A little better," Bea corrected. "But from what Twilight mentioned about Red, my guess would be that no one, even the smart people, in Quahog could recognize them for aliens."

"They finally got rid of their wedding dresses?" Keef asked happily.

"They're not dresses, they're manskirts," Oscar corrected.

"SHE'LL EVEN GO FOR A GUY IN A DRESS!" Milo exclaimed in frustration.

Bea rolled her eyes. "Like you've never been in a dress before, Milo..." Her eyes narrowed, remembering her last sleepover.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"Wow..." Red said as he gazed around the town. "So this is Quahog, huh?"

"It sure is, Mr. Red," Cleveland Brown, Jr. smiled at him. "Though it's home, it's not as homely as back in Stoolbend."

Red smiled at Junior. Cleveland, Jr. tagged along, along with Apple Bloom, Meg, and Rocky, to show the Tallest around Quahog while Brian and Rita introduced Zim to the rest of the family; Mr. Cleveland Brown was at the Griffin house, gathering all of his old Quahog friends to meet Zim...and to make sure Zim as well as Brian were comfortable and unharmed.

Meg's eyes narrowed at the ground as she remembered the Griffins...her former family.

"You really hate them, don't you?" Purple asked her, seeing her scowl.

"Especially Peter..." Meg spat. "He's not my father...no matter how much of our DNA matches..."

"He really wished Meg was a boy..." Brian whispered to Purple.

"Ouch..." Purple cringed. That truly wonderful yet ultimately unusual story had been revealed to the Tallest, with so much drama and suspense and romance it had Purple begging for a sequel.

What he realized now was that they were living the sequel...the sequel which focused on Zim.

Purple looked over at Zim, whom he noticed was looking at Rocky as the brown-eyed girl tapped on her i-phone.

Nah, it couldn't...Purple thought, he's Zim, for Irk's sake...

"Well, I'm sure Jr. and the others will take good care of you two," Brian smiled before checking his watch. "Now we got to introduce Zim to my family..." He sighed with dread.

"That reminds me..." Zim began as he looked at Rita. "Human mother, where is your human daughter?"

As soon as Rita heard that, she closed her eyes and bit her lip. Finally, she opened them and gave him a sad smile. "Nicole wanted to go have fun with her friends in Vegas, sweetheart," she sighed. "I sent her a picture of you, though..."

"And what did she say?" Zim asked hopefully.

Rita sighed. "'Whatever' was all she texted..."

Zim's face fell.

"Oh, Rita, that was harsh," Red said sympathetically. "Your human daughter should be lucky to have Zim as an alien brother."

"I never told her about Zim being an alien," she confessed. "She's just not...well, she's just not like the others...certainly not trusting and kind like Rocky or Apple Bloom."

"All that woman's love she had for her daughter is now all on you, master!" Gir said, nudging Zim.

"And I'm sure Brian's family will love you," Rita told Zim, her fingers stroking the antennas through his wig.

"Okay, Junior, be a good boy and make sure the Tallest don't get killed anywhere," Brian said before he handed the overweight child some money.

"I won't let anything bad happen to Purple," Apple Bloom smiled as she leaned against Purple's leg.

"Here, let me fix that, Zim..." Rocky said as she came over and adjusted the collar on Zim's Irken attire. "There."

Zim blinked at her with slight annoyance yet confusion as he adjusted the collar back as well. "You're not coming, brown-eyed female?"

"Dude, this is your family," Rocky told him, "I am not going anywhere near them. Plus..." She smiled at Tallest Red. "I'm going with the Tallest, remember?"

"Oh..." Zim said, trying so hard to smile. His teeth barred as his left eye twitched. He didn't notice Gir giggling.

"Okay, see you guys in a few hours," Brian said before he and his family waved goodbye to the others.

As Purple waved, he turned to Red. "Did you notice Zim...?"

"Yeah..." Red pondered. "The more I think about it..."

"We are going to have so much fun together!" Junior said happily as he slipped his hands into each of the Tallest and together they walked down the block. "Quahog may seem like a bad place and all...but, oh, the memories before my parents divorced!"
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Brian gazed at the old, yellow house with regret as he and his family approached it. He gazed down at Zim, whom stared at his old home curiously and with an approving smile on his face.

"Well, Earth human dog father," Zim said as they neared the door, "your home is quite an intriguing sight. I bet the other humans of your kind are ever compatible."

"Did you tell him that Quagmire was going to be here?" Rita whispered to Brian.

"I don't want to scare our son," Brian whispered. "I mean, he doesn't even know that Stewie's psychotic!"

"What are we going to eat today?" Gir asked. "I hope it's tacos!"

Brian chuckled. "Actually, Gir, we're going to be having some of Lois's clam chowder. You like chowder?"

"I like anything that reminds me of tacos!" Gir exclaimed happily.

"He'll love chowder," Rita chuckled as Brian rang the doorbell.

The door flew open...and Zim saw the fattest human he had ever seen.

"Wow, Brian, it's been a while!" Peter Griffin chuckled as he smiled down at him. He looked at Rita. "Hey, Betty Davis, how're the nurses been treating you at the old folks' home?"

"Peter..." Brian growled. He hated it when his family, especially Peter, reminded Rita of how much older she was.

Rita sucked in her cheeks, trying to remain calm when she just wanted to kick Peter's ass. "I'm not retired, remember? I'm a teacher..." She said through barred teeth.

"Yeah, I heard some students like to bang the older milfs...even the much older ones," Peter said. Finally, he saw Zim and Gir. "Who are these?"

Zim stood up straight as Peter looked at him. Gir was too busy clapping his hands, hoping for food.

"Greetings, slightly astronomical human..." He said politely. "I am Zim, the adopted human child of the ever-loving humans Brian and Rita."

"And I'm the doggy!" Gir exclaimed happily.

"The hell?" Peter said with confusion. He looked to Brian. "Brian, is he one of those Muslim kids? His skin is freaking weird..."

Brian's fists tightened but he remained calm. "It's a skin condition, Peter..." He tried to hide his growl.

"Uh, let's go in now," Rita cut in, gazing worriedly at the confused Zim. "I'm very happy to see Lois and your two children..." She hid her smile, remembering Meg. Thank God she was happy and safe from these people now...

"Sure thing, Carol Channing," Peter joked as he led them inside.

As soon as Zim entered he gazed around the lovely home. Then he spotted a group of people lined around the living room, smiling at them.

"Oh, hello, Rita," a woman with short red hair greeted as she shook Rita's hand in a feminine gesture. "My how long it's been! I bet your old bones must be aching even more..."

Zim thought she had the most horrid voice he had ever heard. She sounded like a bird going through a shredder!

Rita bit her tongue, trying to fend off the light insult. "Yes, it's good to see you, too..."

"But you're still as lovely as ever," Cleveland cut in, coming out of the kitchen with fresh-baked muffins. He smiled sincerely and apologetically at her.

Rita gave him a thankful nod before she gazed down at Zim. She smiled to the others. "Everyone, this is Zim."

"Greetings, humans!" Zim greeted loudly, putting on his best face.

"Son, you really shouldn't keep calling humans humans," Bria whispered.

"But that's normal, isn't it?" Zim asked.

Peter, Lois, and the others just gazed at Zim. Mouths open, eyes wide...a little baby with a football head, holding some sort of toy gun, looked at Zim with disgust.

"I say..." Stewie said. "He's got the worse skin condition I've ever seen. Worse than Vanessa Hudgens in that one skin care commercial..."

Flashback...

"If you want healthy skin..." Vanessa Hudgens said. "Then try Neutrogena!"

Suddenly, she began scratching her skin, which was becoming red from so much of the product she had applied on herself.

"The ****!" She shouted. "What the **** is wrong with this ****? Someone get me some ******* lotion better than this ****!"

End of flashback...

Zim shifted uncomfortably as all eyes fell on him. Only Cleveland's gaze was ever helpful...Then the alien in disguise noticed a man in an ugly red shirt and the biggest pair of cheekbones he had ever seen stand up from the couch.

"Well, Brian..." He said in a slightly mocking tone. "I guess you've finally found a kid who can deal with your boring crap, considering he's an alien..."

Zim's eyes widened as his forehead began to sweat.

"What country is he from again?" The man asked. "Canada?"

Zim blew a sigh of relief.

Brian's fists tightened. "Careful with my son, Quagmire..." He growled. "He's very sensitive."

"Why is his face so big?" Gir asked, gazing at Quagmire.

"Wow, a dog!" Peter exclaimed. "A dog that owns a dog! Who would have thought!"

"Well, I guess it's not all weird..." A man in a wheelchair said.

"Um, yes..." His wife said. "God makes little gifts for everyone..."

Zim smiled thankfully at her.

"And then..." She bit her lip. "Sometimes he tends to make his gifts quickly, uh..."

And his smile faded.

"Who wants muffins?" Cleveland cut in, holding the tray out.

"Oh, yes, pork cows!" Zim said happily. "I will be honored to have one, my good man."

"They're muffins, sweetheart," Rita told him.

As everyone began to eat, Peter leaned in toward Brian. "Hey, Brian..." He whispered as he watched Zim bite gently into his muffin. "What kind of kid did you and your old lady adopt? What is he, retarded or something?"

"Watch it, Peter," Brian warned him. "He's new to America."

"Well, Canadians suck balls," Peter reminded him.

"Why must you criticize the foreign countries?" Brian sighed. "I mean, Japan gave us technology, German gave us beer..."

"And America gives freedom," Peter giggled.

"Oh, you are such an ass..." Brian muttered under his breath.

Zim munched on his muffin as he sat next to his Earth mother and Gir. Suddenly he noticed Stewie gazing at him with narrowed eyes.

"What?" Zim asked.

"My God!" The baby exclaimed. "You're an abomination!"

Zim's expression darkened as he glared at him. "Look who's talking..."

Stewie growled before he took out his special 'toy'. "Hush up or I'll blow you to bits!"

"What is this?" Zim demanded as he grabbed the 'toy' from his hands.

"Hey, give that back!" Stewie exclaimed, acting much more like a baby.

"This is a weapon?" Zim snorted as he dangled it from his fingers. "Pathetic!" And he threw it out the window. Stewie ran after it, after having heard it go off and some poor pedestrian shouted out.

"Good job," Rita told him before stroking his wig.

"Hello, Rita," Quagmire greeted, smiling.

"Quagmire," Rita muttered under her breath.

"You know, every time I look at a pair of elderly underwear, I think of you," he winked at her.

"Nice..." She hissed. "Everytime I look at a dead pig's head getting chopped off I think of you."

"Giggity-giggity..." He smirked. "I know, I'm quite a piece of meat for your old lady eyes, huh?"

Rita casted a glance down at Zim, who was taking a muffin off Cleveland's tray. Seeing how he was distracted, she turned back to Quagmire and glared at him.

"Go to hell," she hissed before she bit into her muffin roughly.

"I'll take hell as meaning your bed," he chuckled, winking at her.

"So, Brian..." Peter began as he drank a can of beer. "How's the book thing going? I heard people are actually reading your work."

Brian pretended not to hear the insult. "It's going great, Peter. My book's inspiring a lot of people to follow their dreams."

"Yeah..." Peter sighed happily. "A lot of guys dream of grabbing Katy Perry's boobs and a lot of others dream of killing the GEICO gecko..."

Brian sighed, rolling his eyes.

"How are your and Rita?" Lois cut in. "Oh, sweetie, are you two having a hard time in bed?"

"Yeah, last time I noticed Rita could barely move at all," Peter added.

Brian narrowed his eyes. "It was after her hip surgery, she had to steady her pace to ease the pain until it would go away."

"Yeah, being old must suck more than we thought..." Peter sighed.

"My son with the Tallest right now?" Cleveland asked Zim.

"Yes, mustache man," Zim nodded. "I assure you, your slightly overweight son is very sincere to his loyalty of my leaders."

"Yeah, Junior's a great kid," the man chuckled. "Who couldn't love him?"

"The girls?" Quagmire joked.

Cleveland glared at him. "I'm going to check on the cake..." He growled before standing up and going into the kitchen.

That left Zim and Quagmire. Zim played with his fingers nervously as Quagmire looked at him.

"So, Zim..." Quagmire began, trying to start a conversation of any kind. "Seen any girls lately?"

Zim raised an eyeridge. "Human females?"

"Yeah, whatever your foreign kids call them..." Quagmire said quickly. "I'm asking..." He leaned closer. "Been lucky?"

"Lucky?" He asked in confusion.

"What, you didn't get some when you were a kid?" The man asked in surprise. "Wow, I thought lots foreign chicks did sex for money...even the underage ones."

"Zim does not understand what you are saying," he said.

Then Quagmire smiled. "Ever jerked off?"

"Who's a jerk?" Zim asked in confusion.

"Wow, you really must be that retarded, huh?" Quagmire said with annoyance in his voice. "When I was eight, I was peeking at girls in the restroom."

"What does retarded mean?" Zim asked. "Is a human term regarding human strength or something like that?"

"Holy crap..." Quagmire muttered. "Is Brian going to have fun teaching you..."

Suddenly, he was yanked on the collar from behind. Quagmire yelped before he quickly turned his head to see an enraged Brian grasping his collar tightly. The human dog dragged him into the kitchen as soon as Cleveland exited out.

"What the hell, Brian?" He demanded as soon as he released him.

"Quit making my son feel like an idiot!" Brian barked, glaring at him.

"Hey, don't blame me if that kid doesn't get laid by the time he's in high school," Quagmire mocked folding his arms.

Brian just growled. Quagmire never liked him, for reasons that were totally untrue. While Quagmire called Brian a sellout and a total bore, Brian knew Quagmire was far worse. Sexing women up even when they didn't want to, sneaking into women's restrooms, hitting on his wife...Brian would never forget how the idiot just had an affair with Cleveland's wife behind his back...

Now he was insulting his son, and Zim didn't even realize it.

"What are you going to do, dog?" Quagmire challenged. "Bark up my tree?"

Next thing Quagmire knew, he was shoved ever so roughly against the fridge. Brian's powerful hand was pressed roughly against his chest, claws nearly emerging from his hands and pressured against Quagmire's shirt and into his skin.

"Whoa, take it easy, Brian..." Quagmire choked, his eyes widening as he saw the fury in the human dog's eyes.

Brian's grip tightened and Quagmire could feel his claws dig deeper into his skin he feared he would bleed.

"Look..." Brian growled, his eyes never leaving his. "You don't like me, I don't like you." He mashed his teeth together angrily. "But if you do anything ****** up to my son like you tried to **** around with my wife, I will ******* kick your perverted, sorry ass so ******* hard your penis won't rise again."

He slammed Quagmire against the fridge once again, most of the impact on his head.

"You ******* got that, you mother ******?" Brian growled.

Quagmire was too scared to speak. Brian...ever so calm, even to him...he almost looked like he had rabies by the way he growled and his teeth bare and gleaming like a wolf's...

"Uh...um..." He gulped. "O-okay..."

"Good," Brian said in a merrily voice before he let go of his shirt. The threatening expression was gone and he was back to his calm nature. "We don't be here too long, anyway."

And with that said, Brian left Quagmire standing there.

The man slid to the floor, clutching himself as he sat in fear, his eyes still wide. "Holy ****..."
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"I'm starting to get worried about Zim..." Rocky said, playing with her bracelet around her wrist. "Brian's stupid owners might accidentally kill him..."

"Look, my ex-dad may be the biggest idiot in the universe to both man and alien..." Meg said as she casted a glance at the Tallest. "But he could never really get anyone killed..." She bit her lip, wondering if those words were honest.

"How could someone treat you horribly?" Red asked, gazing at Meg. "The way I see it, Megan, you're quite an interesting character."

"Plus, I like the hat," Purple added, pointing at her pink beanie.

Meg smiled with embarrassment. "Well, Peter and Lois never experienced the losses you two had...so I guess cruelty and stupidity just runs through their veins. I mean, it ran in my ex-brothers...especially Stewie."

"Then you must be the positive gene," Red winked.

"Yeah, I'm the one with the happy life, aren't I?" Meg chuckled. "I mean, I'm talking to aliens, and that's an epic win."

"Still, I'm worried about Zim..." Rocky said, playing with her fingers.

Red and Purple shared a glance before gazing back at Rocky, whose eyes were completely focused on her shaking hands.

Finally, Red took her hand and grasped it gently. Rocky looked up and met his assuring face.

Red smiled. She had comforted him at his worse, now he must return the kindness.

"Zim's not like any Irken, Rochelle," he reminded her softly. "He'll survive. I mean, he survived here, didn't he?"

"Because of our help," Junior chimed in.

"Yeah..." Rocky gave a small smile. "I guess you're right."

Music blared in the distance...music only Junior could recognize.

"Ice cream!" He exclaimed happily as he spotted a nearby ice cream truck park itself across the block. "Make way, Cleveland Brown, Jr.'s getting some triple fudge!"

"I'm coming, too!" Apple Bloom exclaimed. She smiled at Purple before galloping after him.

"I better watch them in case Junior raids the truck like he almost did last time," Meg said as she rushed after them.

"For such a big-boned human..." Red observed. "I must admit, Junior is certainly quite a hearty character..."

"He has a heart as big as his stomach," Rocky told him. "Which is why we love him..." She tried to hide her blush. "And whom I think is just so cute!" She dared not squeal, not wanting to be anything compared to Abjay.

"Uh-oh..." Purple muttered as he gazed at Red.

Suddenly, Rocky's phone rang. She checked it. She turned to the Tallest. "It's Fanboy. I got to take this." The Tallest nodded as Rocky walked a small distance as she talked on the phone.

"She's a great human girl," Purple commented as he gazed at Rocky. "No wonder Zim seemed so excited the first time he introduced us to her."

"Yes," Red nodded, "her brown eyes are especially interesting...I can truly understand why Zim was so...verbal."

"I will admit this now," Purple said. "I think Rochelle is so-"

"Get back here!"

Red turned his head and gazed through the window of the shop he and Purple stood in front of. Inside the store, he noticed a female brunette in a gray hoodie and sweatpants running around the shop, chasing after rabbits that had escaped from their cage.

"Red?" Purple spoke.

"Uh, hang on," Red told him before he left him standing there before opening the door of the shop.

"Come on, guys," the brunette pleaded as she picked up a couple of rabbits off the floor while more just scattered around. "Really, I don't want any rabbits left behind!"

Red watched as she struggled and gathered more in her arms. He played with his fingers nervously. This was a complete human stranger, someone no one in Zim's circle even knew...

But if there anything he learned from Rochelle and the others, especially Twilight, it was to help those in need.

Taking a deep breath, Red fell to his knees and gathered a few rabbits in his arms.

The brunette turned and saw him. When he noticed her looking at him, he nearly froze, the rabbits struggling in his arms.

"Uh..." He began nervously, his head sweating through his wig. "Here..." He said as he stood up. "Got a few of your...bunnies..."

The brunette smiled gratefully. "Just put them here." She said as she motioned to a nearby cage. She dropped her captured ones in there.

Red nodded quietly before he dropped his there and resumed capturing the others.

Finally, after Red dropped the last rabbit into the cage. He turned to see the brunette smile shyly at him.

"Hey, thanks," she said quietly, "yeah...these rabbits are really active..."

"They're cute, though..." He chuckled nervously.

She resumed her smile at him. "My name's Lol, by the way."

Red blinked. "Lol?"

"Yeah, I know..." She sighed. "L-O-L? Laugh Out Loud?"

"It's quite an interesting name..." He said carefully. "Um..." He bit his lip, not wanting to offend the human female.

Lol smiled at him. "When I was born, my mother said I had the cutest laugh, and doctors and nurses could heard it halls away from my room. So my mother named my Lol."

"That's a nice origin story," He said quietly.

She continued looking at him. "What's your name?"

Red gulped. "Well, um..." He played with his fingers nervously. "It's...uh...it's, um...it's Red."

"Red?" Lol repeated, raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah..." He said quietly. "See, my mom's favorite color was red...and I was wrapped in a red blanket when I was born...and my dad would tell me...um, that I hugged the color so tight they decided to name me Red."

In truth, when Red was born, he had his mother's red Irken eyes. His father told him that after he was born, he would try and get out of his crib to see his mother while she rested after giving birth to him. The doctors would put him back in his crib afterwards, but he would escape once again. His father always told him there was fire in his eyes, like determination and adventure. That fire was deep within the color red, and that was why they decided to name him Red, like how his mother was named Sangria and his father was named Cobalt; both represented colors.

But he was honest when he mentioned he had been wrapped in a red blanket when he was held by his mother; he hugged both her and the blanket with so much love.

"Yeah..." Red said nervously. "Red's the name."

"It's a nice name," Lol told him. "It's very original..." She said with a shy smile.

Red was about to say something, but they were distracted by the tapping on the window. Both turned and Red saw Purple tapping on the glass, calling for him. He pointed behind him to show the ice cream truck on fire.

"Oh, no..." Red muttered. He smiled apologetically to Lol. "Well, got to get going!" He said quickly. "Uh, bye, Lol!" Eyes focused on her, he didn't watch where he was going and bumped his head into the side of the doorway. He rubbed his head and chuckled nervously at her before quickly exiting out of the building.

"What happened?" Red cried as he Junior, Meg, Rocky, and Apple Bloom stood by Purple.

"It wasn't my fault!" Junior said skeptically.

"The idiot running the truck was going on and on about how his life is meaningless!" Meg explained. "He was so pissed with himself that he got himself on fire and just...well, he's dead now."

"Suicide?" Red exclaimed with shock.

"There's a lot more crazy here than you know," Meg told him in a dark tone.

Red gulped.

"Hey, what were you doing in the pet shop?" Meg asked as she looked through the window and saw Lol feeding the rabbits. "Were you looking for an Earth pet?"

"No," Red said quickly. "That human was having trouble and, learning of your Earthly ways, I decided to help her."

"Way to go, Tallest Red!" Rocky cheered.

"Come on, let's get out of here," Meg said quickly before she hustled the others away as a firetruck rode into view.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"Ms. Lemur!" Rarity squealed as Vanessa, followed by Keef, Bea, Milo, and Oscar, wearing breathing devices, entered her boutique. "So good to see you! And my, how lovely you're looking today!"

The female lemur smiled. "Thank you, dear," she said.

"Like, oh, my gosh!" Bea exclaimed as she raced over to a nearby cart. "These outfits are so cute!"

"You should see the outfits I had given to the Tallest," Rarity said proudly.

"We know..." Milo muttered. "Twilight called."

"Did someone mention my name?" Called a familiar voice.

Milo's eyes shot up before he quickly turned around. There stood Twilight Sparkle in the doorway, with Spike by her side.

"Twilight!" Milo exclaimed, trying to hide his surprise.

"Good to see you here, Milo," the violet pony smiled as she trotted into the boutique. Her smile grew larger as she saw Vanessa. "Ms. Lemur!"

"Hello,dear Twilight," she greeted as she embraced the pony. "My, isn't your mane looking ever the loveliest!"

Twilight tried not to blush. She turned to Rarity. "Rarity, I accidentally took these," she said as she handed her a small bean bag with needles on it.

"Oh, I was wondering where they were," Rarity smiled. "Thank you, darling."

"So, uh, Twilight..." Milo began, smiling at her nervously. "I'm guessing you're digging Red's new digs, huh?"

"Oh, Milo..." Twilight sighed as her violet eyes sparkled, gazing up at the ceiling. "Red just looked so...so...handsome."

Milo nearly choked on his spit. Spike nearly choked on his fire breath.

"He's not that handsome," Spike said sarcastically, averting his eyes as he folded his arms.

"Oh, but he is!" Twilight swooned as she galloped around the boutique like a little filly. "Even before he was all dressed up, I always thought he had a special something, even when he acted like a total jerk..."

"R-really?" Milo gulped, gazing at her with one eye twitching. No one noticed Spike puff some smoke out of his nostrils.

She stopped in front of a red satin scarf displayed on a mannequin. She gazed at the color before she nuzzled her head against the scarf, sighing breathlessly as her eyes fluttered closed.

"Oh, my Tallest..." She sighed with a dreamy smile. "My Almighty Tallest...my Almighty Tallest Red...my Red..."

"Oh, barf..." Spike gagged, trying not to show his scowl.

"My, I've never seen Twilight like this..." Rarity said as she and the others observed Twilight's actions as she danced around the shop, the scarf wrapped around her neck. "And to think she was always so focused on her studies..."

Bea smirked as she watched Milo glower with jealousy. "There are some things that can catch a girl's eye...like maybe being tall...serious...or maybe just being cute and all..."

"Bea..." Vanessa hissed.

"You're going to buy that, dearie?" Rarity asked as she watched Twilight twirl around in the red scarf.

"Oh, absolutely..." Twilight sighed. "In fact..."

Before Rarity knew it, a bag of coins fell before her hooves. Rarity's eyes widened before she looked at Twilight, whose violet eyes sparkled even more they would make the stars look like they weren't shining.

"I would be really grateful if you could make me a little something, Rarity," she pleaded softly. "Something nice...something wonderful..."

Rarity blinked at her.

"Something red..."

"Well..." Rarity began as she picked up the bag. "Whatever you desire, darling."

"Oh, she definitely desires something..." Bea snickered.

Oscar looked over to his brother, who held a ghost of an expression on his face as he watched Twilight being measured by Rarity.

"Hey, come on, bro," he assured him. "Wouldn't Twilight look great in red?"

"Uh, yeah," Vanessa chuckled nervously. "I mean, imagine Twilight in a gorgeous, red dress...and not thinking about you-know-who..." She bit her lip as she gazed at Milo.

"Uh, red..." Milo muttered. He placed his hands in his face. "I might never look at a tomato without thinking about it..."

"This is just plain dull..." Spike muttered.

But deep down, it was just plain infuriating.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
"Wow," Purple said as he gazed at the building he and the others walked by, "so this was your old school?"

"Yeah..." Meg sighed. "The place where I was an outcast, even by my own teachers..."

"But, Meg," Red said, "you're an intelligent being, surely the teachers would respond to you for that."

"Apparently, they thought hotness was number one..." She muttered.

"But you're hot!" Junior exclaimed. He blushed when she gazed at him in surprise. "Well, it's true..."

"Look, people here just aren't all that great," Rocky explained to the Tallest. "Why do think Brian and Rita decided so quickly to leave this place for New York?"

"I honestly must say," Purple said. "New York has class."

"Hey, someone's having a bake sale!" Apple Bloom exclaimed as she pointed a hoof over to a nearby stand.

"Oh, I bet there's upside-down peanut butter fudge cake!" Junior exclaimed as he raced over.

The others followed him. Purple was right behind them-

"Honestly, Alejandro!"

Purple turned his head toward a nearby doorway at the school. There stood a blonde human female with a tanned teen in baggy jeans and black cap.

The female glared at the teen while he just averted his eyes, as if he could care less.

"You really need to stop with trying to break into the snack machines, spray-painting in the restrooms, and back-talking at your teachers!" She went on. "You've been suspended twice!"

"Big deal," the boy known as Alejandro muttered in a thick accent.

"This really is a big deal, Alejandro," she sighed. "Really, your a student with good grades, both your parents are doctors...why do this?"

"Because I'm cool," he said simply.

Purple watched as the female groaned. "Just get back into my office. I'm going to think for a while."

Alejandro just shrugged before he went back inside. Purple watched as the blonde paced back and forth, muttering under her breath. He noticed her taking a small box of something out of her pocket, then she took something out of it. He recognized it immediately as a cigarette humans used to calm themselves of stress.

He watched as she dug into her pocket, looking for a lighter.

Remembering the lighter Rodolfo gave him for emergency, Purple cautiously approacher her, pleading his human disguise would work for real.

"Um..." He began as he took out his lighter.

The female turned to him, the cigarette dangling from her fingers.

"Uh, need a light?" He asked nervously, holding out his unused lighter.

The blonde smiled gratefully, but she shook her head. "That's okay," she sighed before placing back her cigarettes in her pockets. "I don't smoke..." She chuckled in embarrassment. "I've just gone through so much stress in my job that I wind up becoming so close to smoking..."

"Um, okay..." Purple nodded cautiously. "Uh, what is your job?"

"I'm a counsellor," she explained. "And that punk I was talking to a few seconds ago was one of the students I was trying to advise..."

"He doesn't seem so bad..." Purple said carefully.

"Oh, sure..." She rolled her eyes. "He's a straight-A student with parents who work awesome jobs...yet he is being such a bastard because he thinks it makes him cool." She sighed again. "The girls like him even more for this bad boy image..."

"Well, I'm sure you could talk some sense into him," Purple assured her nervously. "I mean, this is your job. You can do it."

"Yeah..." She groaned. "I'm been doing so for weeks, but that punk just won't seem to listen." She smiled apologetically at Purple. "Sorry about that..." She said quickly. She held out her hand to him. "My name's Winn."

Purple gazed down at her hand held out to him. He smiled nervously at her before slowly reaching over and grasped her hand gently, letting her do all the shaking.

"What's your name?" She asked.

"Um..." He bit his lip. "It's uh...Purple."

"Purple?" She repeated, sounding surprised. "That's quite an unusual name..."

"Um, yeah..." He said quietly. "Mother wanted a name that would fit my character, and seeing how I was born with quite some fear and some urgency with a little eagerness for the world, she decided to name me Purple."

"Okay..." Winn said slowly as she gazed at his attired, all symbolizing his name well. "Well, Purple," she chuckled. "I got to get back into my office before Alejandro wrecks havoc." She opened the door to the school office as she smiled at him. "See you around."

"Uh, yeah..." He said nervously as she closed the door behind her. "See you...around." He just stood there, looking at the door.

"Tallest Purple!"

Purple turned to see Apple Bloom waving at him, a cupcake in her hoof.

"I got you the last cupcake!" She exclaimed happily.

"Cupcake!" Purple exclaimed happily before he raced over to her.